Being a mother is stressful. Wonderful, but stressful. I have found that I don’t use my de-stressing tactics enough when I really should. We know what relaxes us but we don’t use these tactics when we should opting to stew in our misery instead of accepting the truth of the current situation and adjusting to suit. As I was listening to Super Soul Sunday on OWN this morning I was reminded of this fact. We tend to make things harder on ourselves than they need to be. We seem to prefer stewing in misery, than accepting our present situation and moving on. When I am having a bad day or feeling out of it I have a few triggers to help me move on quickly and avoid dwelling. Here are my happiness triggers.
Sharing with loved ones.
Venting is healthy. So even though you may feel like you are bringing a room down – Share! Find a friend or family member you can trust and spill the details of your day, tragedy or struggle. The key to doing this and not being a pain in the other person’s life, in my opinion, is two-fold. Don’t over do it and reciprocate. Spill when something is truly wrong. Perhaps don’t call every time a problem arrises but definitely when you feel you just can’t make it through the day without a friendly voice. I love my venting group because they are great listeners, they are honest with a huge dose of kindness. They don’t always tell me what I want to hear but everything they tell me comes from a place of love.
In the absence of people, I love and chocolate…
This is not a good one. This one is dangerous plain and simple. It is a happiness trigger for me just the same. I love sweets. Especially chocolate and having been a skinny girl most of my life I could eat without worry about what I would look like later. This is no longer true. My age is catching up with my bad habit and the result is unsatisfactory. Still nothing beats a sweet treat when I’m frustrated or sad. I am working on a healthier relationship with food.
For me music is like a switch. There is little music can’t fix. I can literally shift my whole outlook with a great lyric or beat. I sing, badly or well it doesn’t mater. I dance, it is embarrassing but effective. The music goes through me and my mood lifts. I love it best loud and varied. Variety is the spice of life! I should use this one way more often.
More specifically, our son, Little J. Even when he’s the source of my worry or frustration, nothing melts my heart like looking at those big brown eyes. Seeing him smile and laugh, heaven!
What are your happiness triggers?